I'm not. No Pips, I'm not. Because I made only one resolution last year which was not to travel on public transport, as you very well know, and yet within two seconds we were back on the number 38 bus which was sickening it really was. So no. But I have a resolution for you.
'Let's have a think for you'.
It's a waste of time even thinking about it Pips.
'What might they be George?'
I'm not interested.
'Well plenty of resolutions are coming to mind. Let's see... my goodness, we're spoilt for choice. Number One has to be to get on the bus without having a tantrum. Secondly, not to play with your tinkly ball while I am trying to meditate. Thirdly, to not turn your nose up at cheaper dog food when I need to save money. What else..? Oh yes, to stop standing in the middle of the DVD shop getting in everyone's way... well basically they're all to do with doing what you're told. In fact they can all be summed up in just one resolution - to behave yourself. What do you think?'
Um... let me think for a second...
'Do you think that behaving yourself could perhaps be this New Year's Resolution?'
Ooh... ah! Can-to-na! Just kidding Pips.
'Yes George?'
No.
Pips? You never asked what resolution I have in mind for you. Pips? Pips? Pips? PIPS!
'Yes! What is it George?'
To stop telling me what to do.
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