Seventy Four

‘George come on. It’s about to piss with rain. Let’s go home before we get soaked again’.
‘Freds! George! Come out from behind those hollyhocks! What are they doing?’
‘I don’t know. This is what it’s been like all week. George won’t have anything to do with me’.
‘I’m not surprised Philippa’.
‘Oh Terry don’t make me feel any more awful about it than I already do. I didn’t mean it, I was stressed’.
‘But you’ve obviously traumatised him’.
‘George? Come on’.
I am talking to Freddie, Pips, I am not talking to you.
‘See? He’s ignoring me. I’ve spent the entire week talking to his bottom’.
‘George? It’s Uncle Terry here’.
I am not speaking to Philippa at the moment Terry so do not make me.
‘Ah, your face at last!’
She has been very naughty and I have had it up to here.
‘Oh… and there we go. He disappears behind the flowers again. What did I tell you?’
‘George? I know Philippa threatened to send you back to Battersea the other day’.
She did Terry, yes.
‘Honestly! How could she say that to you?’
Because she is thoughtless and uncaring and cruel.
‘Do you need a hug George?’
‘Oh he won’t like that. He can’t bear being picked up. Always makes a huge fuss…’
I don’t mind being picked up by Terry, Pips, because he is kind to me.
‘But I think he needs a cuddle don’t you George?’
‘He won’t let you pick him up’.
Yes I will. And I have told you before not to speak for me Pips.
‘Are you going to come for a cuddle with Uncle Terry? That’s it…….. There we go. See? He doesn’t mind at all, do you George?’
‘That’s the first time he’s allowed anyone to pick him up without creating a scene’.
He wasn’t talking to you Pips, actually.
‘You’ve damaged his trust in humanity Philippa, hasn’t she George?’
Yes, I am very upset Terry. I have been having nightmares every night that I am back at Battersea and Big Trish is teasing me’.
‘You’ve scarred his psyche. You can’t give a home to a dog from Battersea and then threaten to send him back just because he’s been a bit naughty, can she George?’
‘Emptying Simon’s bag and running around with a pack of condoms he found in there is not a ‘bit’ naughty. I don’t want to know about my boss’s sex life!’
Terry would it be possible for me to come and live with you and Freddie and Will if I have to move out because I don’t want to go back to Battersea, I really don’t.
‘I’ll tell you a secret George……………………………………….’.
Really Terry? I would be thrilled. That would be terrific!
‘There we are, look at that. He’s wagging his tail. He’s back to his old self again. He just needed a cuddle and a bit of reassurance didn’t you George? He has a fragile ego Philippa’.
Terry says I can live with him and Will and Freddie if you don’t want me anymore Pips, so there.
‘I tell you what. As you two are obviously best mates now and enjoying each other’s company so much/’
‘Just a bit of male bonding Philippa’.
‘Fine. Exactly. And as that’s something I’m never going to be able to provide as I’m the wrong gender, why don’t we do a swap? You can have George, Terry, and I’ll have Freddie. How about that Freddie?’
NO NO NO NO NO NO NO! PIPS IS MINE. FREDDIE STAY AWAY!
‘George I’m not talking to you. I was talking to Freddie’.